Poison

 If you have ever met me, you'll be in no doubt that I love food. That is not so say that I am a food lover in any elitist or refined sense. It's more about a 'lack of fussiness' when it comes to eating. Sure, there are foods I am not so keen on, such as the evil and falsely lauded aubergine, which, whilst on the outside having a very pleasing colour, on the inside has the texture of a squashed slug scraped off the pavement, but in general I'll eat what is in front of me, and on occasion what is in front of you too! (As a note here for American readers Aubergine = Eggplant and pavement =sidewalk).

In earnest I can't understand how anyone would not love food. I have met a few people who either (So they claimed) didn't really care about food, or those who weren't bothered about films, or some even music!? (And after God and people, that is just about all I live for. Ok, I admit it. I stuck people in there to sound like a good Christian. ) Such people are an anathema to me.

What I really mean by 'I love food', is, I am fat. Now I am fat for a number of reasons. The ones you should know about are that, although I am now well into my forties, I was a skinny kid and I still eat like one. The other is that along with my slowing metabolism and accelerating weight gain came an increased inactivity, and the compounding factor is that when you see this cycle and look at yourself in the mirror, one result for some people is to lose all motivation. I have been guilty of being such a person.

And so recently due to some health concerns and for some spiritual purposes, I came, this January to give up sugar, completely, for 40 days. And along with sugar came bread. 

Now this is not a diet blog but a spiritual one, attempting to explore scriptural themes and social realities from a bible based Jesus-centric position. My goodness I like to be grandiose, don't I?!

So all you need to know about my sojourn in the sugar free wilderness is that it went well, and I lost a little weight. I prayed through it, and throughout the whole thing, but not excessively.

I noticed that I did not appear to suffer from any of the withdrawals that the book I was following described and I didn't feel in myself much different, and as, despite my generous appetite and love of chocolate, I've never had a particularly sweet tooth (I love sweet AND savoury equally) I almost began to dismiss this as simply an exercise of willpower and an aid to weight loss.

It was only on re-entering the sugar orbit on the backend of the 40 days that I began to realise the truth of those early observations. On Friday night I indulged in Pizza followed by ice cream. I enjoyed it, but not as much as I was expecting given the lengthy anticipation. But on Saturday morning I woke up with symptoms akin to an alcohol hangover. And since then, I have been having digestive issues, headaches , mood swings and a lack of energy.

The thing is, on its way out sugar's side-effects had almost been undetectable as they gradually went. But on its way back, it was like I'd taken a drug or some poison.

Now, at no point previous to this in my whole life have I been without sugar for longer than perhaps  24 hours. I say this because also, at no point in my conscious life have I ever know what it was to be sugar free. As Joni Mitchel sang 'you don't know what you've got till it's gone', and now that cleanness was disappearing, I felt it's loss, keenly.

The reason for this blog, and for my slightly alarming title 'Poison', is this. People who preach the evils of sugar will tell you that (refined) sugar is basically both a drug and a poison. As my self description will have divulged, I am not someone usually obsessed with (or even interested in, if I am honest), health and dietary issues, but a part of me was curious to see what sort of effects this sugar free life would bring out in my body. But  the result is now that I feel as though I were poisoned all my life, but haven't really known it. How could I have? I was steeped in the stuff from before I could even walk.

  

     "I feel as though I were poisoned all my life, but haven't really known it"

Now this is where we leave the diet stuff behind, unless it is for the purposes of metaphor or illustration.

The point is, I was poisoned, but I didn't even know it. People talked about it but I did not see any need to worry. I was, on the whole alright, and besides, this was just how I was. Sure I don't sleep well, and have mood swings and dodgy guts, but that's just me. There were other reasons for those things.

And I am convinced, that we as Christians in a secular, liberal society, especially those of us who were born into it, have never know anything else. This is just how it is. The level of tolerance and ignorance of evil is so engrained.

The analogy of boiling frogs springs to mind. All my life the water temperature has been rising slowly and at a steady pace and it is about to turn critically hot but it may be too late for us. 

It is that we are unaware of the temperature, ignorant of any other life lived than the ones we live with the effects of the toxins we are spoon fed on a daily basis. We just have no clue.

Many Christians have seen the documentary 'Sheep Among Wolves' where an Iranian Christian woman comes to live in the west and at one point finds herself wanting to return to Iran with all its persecution because she identifies that it as if we are under a satanic lullaby that has lulled us all to sleep.

And how do you wake yourself up, if you are asleep? You need someone who is already awake to  shake you!

I'd like to give you insights into the culture and tell you what the poison consists of, and I am sure I could have a stab at a few things. In fact I could reel off a huge list of things that we have accepted over and in our lives that are evidence of our being at home with the toxin.

My late mother could not stand to watch anything with Blasphemy in. She could just about tolerate 'Oh My God' but if someone said 'Jesus Christ' as a curse, she would wince the first time and turn it off the second time. Now I can see signs of my mother's own poisoning, but she was way more switched on than I ever was to this. I don't like it when I hear it, but I have literally never turned off a film because of blasphemous language. And I am well aware that if I did, I would possibly lose about 85% of the things I watch for entertainment. And that includes things that would otherwise seem innocuous.

Now I know Christians, both of the older generation than myself and my contemporaries who will be more selective about their viewing choices on the basis of their faith, but I know many, many more who are not.

Don't get me wrong. I am not about to launch a Mary Whitehouse style campaign to clean the stream up. And I am not suggesting puritanical denouncement of blasphemy, book burnings or boycotts or pickets etc. It isn't anything I had in my mind until I searched it just now for an example of the kind of thing which is indicative of our unconscious poisoning, but hear me out. This is how we react to the denigration of the name of our God who we claim to love, (the one we proclaim hallowed every time we pray the Lords prayer), and the name of our saviour (whose name we proclaim higher than any other name) get this....FOR OUR ENTERTAIMENT! We are Christians and we feel no shame for this, nor fear either.

If you do, I salute you, but I speak to those who are like me.

So there you go. I have just plunged the knife in randomly to a piece of our culture to see what the cake's layers will reveal. And I could easily pick on something else within our tolerance zones. Gluttony, vanity, greed, sexual immorality. And so much, more. But I won't right now. I will just leave 3 questions. 

What poison have you been unwittingly ingesting, and what would God have you do about it? What would you have God do about it?

Hey, lent starts tomorrow. What do you say....?