Discipline

I've been spending a lot of time in Hebrews 12 today,  where we are reminded that God disciplines those he loves, or loves those he disciplines.

Now, I have to be honest. Although I have been a Christian nearly all my life and I have  long understood the same God who so loved the world that he sent his only son, is the same God who allowed Job to be tormented by the devil. I've not found this picture of a loving but disciplinarian Father to be all that helpfull.
I have understood that his love is unquestionable,  even when we are going through the worst of times and that somehow,  in his mystery, he allows us to go through suffering because he wants us to grow. Because he loves us.

 

But here's the thing.  It always seemed a bit twisted to me.  Sadistic, almost. Not because I doubt his love, but because I doubt his method.

And I realised today why that was. It is my relationship with the word discipline. You see, where I read the word discipline, I heard 'punishment'. I've been to bible college.  I know this is not what is being spoken of, but subconsciously I don't think I have ever escaped the connotations of the word.

When I think discipline,  I think of the smacking and humiliation I received as a child.  The phrases that stick in my head are 'I'm doing this because I love you', 'this is hurting me more than it is you' and the all time classic,  'it's for your own good!'

I am not suggesting for a minute my father didn't love me. I am not attempting to set this out as a case against corporal punishment. It has its detractors but this is not the time and place for it. The problem is that for a child, its a very confusing message. I'm being hurt here but I'm being told that this is good, that this is love??

But the issue with this kind of discipline is that it is more of a punishment than it is anything else. It is retribution and penalty.  It seems, as I suppose all these things do, to act as a deterrent,  or like aversion therapy.

 

I guess I have never shaken those associations with the word discipline. Especially in terms of Gods discipline.

 

But if we take the word in another of its forms  'disciple' we have entirely different concepts to work with. Think of the way Jesus corrects his disciples, lovingly,  at times with humour.  Sometimes with  the stern rebuke. Yes.  But always with a tender tone. And disciples are there for one thing,  to learn.  And that is what is behind even my own childhood discipline.  My Father was not just disciplining me when he was punishing me. That was just one small part of the discipline he offered me. He discipled me when he taught me to mend a puncture or to solve a mathematical problem.  He discipled me when he showed kindness to my mother,  he discipled me when he prayed with me.  He discipled me through every part of life that he shared with me. This was discipline too. And he did it because he loved me. He wanted to equip me as best as he could to face the world as a godly man. And I respect him for it.

 

And so when I think of Heavenly Father disciplining me today, I see his tender love, his care for me. He is discipling me 'through' the hard times and suffering. He is teaching me, with me, by my side. He's not above, me, pouring out some kind of karmic retribution, hurting me for my own good. He disciples those he loves.